The catastrophes that have occurred in the past few years, are each reminders of what’s really important in our lives.  As we’ve witnessed recently in Japan, it’s heartbreaking to see people losing family members, their homes, and in some cases, entire communities.

The upside to these events, if there’s a silver lining, is that we have been enlightened and presented with the opportunity to respond with monetary gifts, personal service, prayer, and hope.  The generosity of people who are assisting in the relief efforts is awe-inspiring.

For people who have lost everything, their hopes lie not in finding material things, but in being reunited with their loved ones.

Like it or not, we have been consciously awakened and prompted to reflect on the fragility of our own lives.   How do we spend the precious time we have been given?  Are we ready for the unexpected?  Do we have a plan for our own family?  What can we learn from this? What can we do to help?

“When we become aware that we do not have to escape our pains, but that we can mobilize them into a common search for life, those very pains are transformed from expressions of despair into signs of hope.” ~ Henri Nouwen

Blessings,

Evelyn

Moving through this busy month in preparation for Christmas, I have tried to savor the moments spent with the people I love, enjoy reading the greeting cards, the shopping, wrapping, and the many blessings of this holy season.  It’s not any easy task, as there is soooo much to do.   Remaining calm and not frazzled during this time of year is clearly a “mind over matter” exercise.

It’s nostalgic to reflect on our special memories of Christmas, and share them with the people in our midst.    My sons love the following story from my childhood.

When I was five years old, I celebrated Christmas Eve with my baby brother and parents at my grandparent’s home.  It was very exciting to imagine Santa’s arrival that night and celebrate with my family.

At one point during the evening, while we were gathered downstairs in their finished basement (typical of the East coast), I saw Santa at the top of the stairs.  I couldn’t see his face, but everyone exclaimed that he had arrived.  I looked up and could see his signature red suit as he descended the stairs.   As he came closer, I noticed his big feet and said, “Santa is wearing Daddy’s shoes!”  I don’t remember anything after that except the family’s laughter.

It’s remarkable how some of our experiences remain untainted and so easy to access.  My father died tragically two years later, the day before his 30^th birthday, but he is still with me. Our “wonderful” memories are powerful and important to our well being and personal journey.   We have to carefully choose our thoughts to avoid the negative thought loops, especially this time of year.

Inspired by the written word, I have selected the following Christmas quotations to share with you.

Christmas is the keeping-place for memories of our innocence. – Joan Mills

Christmas is a bridge.  We need bridges as the river of time flows past.  Today’s Christmas should mean creating happy hours for tomorrow and reliving those of yesterday.  – Gladys Tabor

Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love.  – Hamilton Wright Mabie

Christmas gift suggestions: to your enemy, forgiveness; to an opponent, tolerance.; to a friend, your heart; to a customer, service; to all, charity;  to every child, a good example; to yourself, respect.  – Oren Arnold

Christmas is not as much about opening our presents as opening our hearts.  – Janice Maeditere

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other.  – Burton Hillis

Christmas!  The very word brings joy to our hearts.  No matter how we may dread the rush, the long Christmas lists for gifts and cards to be bought and given – - when Christmas Day comes there is still the same warm feeling we had as children, the same warmth that enfolds our hearts and our homes.      – Joan Winmill Brown

It is Christmas in the heart that puts Christmas in the air.  – W. T. Ellis

What is Christmas? It is tenderness for the past, courage for the present, hope for the future.  It is a fervent wish that every cup may overflow with blessings rich and eternal, and that every path may lead to peace.                      – Agnes M. Pharo

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others.  Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that? – Bob Hope

A song was heard at Christmas
To wake the midnight sky:
A saviour’s birth, and peace on earth,
And praise to God on high.
The angels sang at Christmas
With all the hosts above,
And still we sing the newborn King
His glory and his love. – Timothy Dudley-Smith

Let us have music for Christmas…
Sound the trumpet of joy and rebirth;
Let each of us try, with a song in our hearts,
To bring peace to men on earth. – Mildred L. Jarrell

A final thought…

Music makes this season very special.  Can you imagine the holidays without it?  Thank you to all the composers, lyricists, conductors, musicians, vocalists, and music directors who have passionately given their gift of music to embrace us all.

Make merry memories!

Peace and joy,

Evelyn

November brings a chill to the air, stunning changes in the colors of the leaves, the scent of warm pumpkin pie, and the anticipation of Thanksgiving.  As we prepare to celebrate this traditional American holiday, here’s a thought provoking quotation about Gratitude by William Ward.

“God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today.
Have you used one to say “thank you?”

The above quotation, though simple, reminds us of the importance of time, the most precious blessing of all.  Without it, we wouldn’t be able to be with the people that we love and do the activities we enjoy.  We often spend our “down” time worrying, judging ourselves, and trying to avoid the negative pop-ups whirling around in our minds.  It can be overwhelming, especially when we’re trying to let go of work related stress, worries about our family members, past hurts, and so on.  Our negative thoughts can dramatically change the way we feel.

A remedy?  Time passes quickly, so when a negative thought pops in, we can use some of our daily seconds to reflect with gratitude on the things that we value…family, friends, our pets, and our planet Earth, which provides everything we need.  These are truly the only things that matter.

Author and lecturer, Louise Hay, expresses this beautifully in her book You Can Heal Your Life.  “Each one of us creates our thoughts… the thoughts we think and the words we speak create our experiences.”  She goes on to say that “the only thing we are ever dealing with is a thought, and a thought can be changed.”  Louise suggests using positive self-affirmations to keep us moving forward.  Here’s an example… “This is a new day, one that I have never lived before.  I stay in the NOW and enjoy each and every moment.”  Daily use of affirmations will keep negative thoughts from dominating your consciousness.  Try them!

May you experience many “grateful” seconds leading up to a Happy Thanksgiving!

Wishing you many blessings,

Evelyn

Evelyn & Tim at 49er Season Opener

As a single mother with two sons, who are now nineteen and twenty-five, I have adjusted to the dual role (mom and dad) of parenting due to their father’s absence from our family.  At times it has been difficult, but I could never have chosen to do otherwise.  I am truly blessed to have Steven and Timothy in my life.

When my son, Tim, was in the second grade, he played on the same soccer team as Jerry Rice’s son, Jerry.  It was a difficult football season for Jerry Sr., due to the fact that at the 49ers home opener in 1997, he injured his knee.  Jerry came to Little Jerry’s soccer games each week, and humbly hobbled onto the soccer field with his crutches to watch the games with the other parents.   We were in awe of him and sorry that he couldn’t play football, but respected his privacy as a dad.  As the team mom, I enjoyed planning the end of season event for the team.  Jerry agreed to take photos with the kids and sign autographs and this was a treat for all of us.  I bought a gift for him from the team – a red baseball cap embroidered with the words “Run, Jerry, Run” – a phrase I borrowed from Forrest Gump.  He sincerely appreciated the gesture and wore the cap during the party.  It was our hope that he would soon be able to “run” again, as he had done successfully for so many years.   He returned to football fourteen weeks later.

This past August, I learned that Jerry Rice entered the Pro Football Hall of Fame and was going to be honored at the home opener at Candlestick Park in San Francisco.  The 49ers were to play the 2010 Super Bowl Champs, the New Orleans Saints, at the Monday Night Football Game on September 20^th.  At this game, the 49ers would pay tribute to the legendary wide receiver, and his jersey #80 would be retired.

I decided to purchase two tickets to this football game, and Tim and I really looked forward to seeing Jerry, and the other 49er Hall of Famers who would probably be there.  Our seats were in the first row of the Upper Reserved section, and when we arrived, there were two ticket checkers sitting in our seats.   No one else was seated in the entire section.  We had arrived early and jokingly told them that they were sitting in our seats.   They stood up and gave us each a SF 49er pin and congratulated us for being there early.   We really appreciated the gift, and I immediately placed the pin on my 49er fleece jacket.

I sat down, and not even ten seconds later, a young man in a jacket and tie appeared and asked me if these were our seats.  I replied with a “yes” and he then asked me if we would like a seat upgrade.  I asked him “where?” and he said, “the best seats in the stadium.”  I said “you’re kidding me, right?”  He then added that we would be sitting in two leather chairs, with our own TV, on the field in the end zone.  We were the winners of the United Airlines Seat Upgrade of the Game!

He gave us special passes to wear, and we followed him down to the field.  Needless to say, we were both excited and in shock.   Tim and I were escorted up to our own platform and given an SF 49er goodie bag with tee shirts, hats, and other items.  Our UA escort told us that we had to remain in our seats for the entire first quarter, as we would be filmed for the jumbotron as the upgrade winners.   We couldn’t believe it!   The NFL photographers gave us a “thumbs up” as they would pass us by and stopped to take our picture.  I had wanted this to be a special night for Tim, and it was turning out to be much more than I ever imagined.

Being a shutterbug, prior to the game I took pictures of Tim with a group of soldiers who were standing directly behind us.   They were going to bring out the American Flag during the game.  I also took pictures of him with two of the 49er cheerleaders, and we had pictures taken with Sourdough Sam, the 49er mascot, who spent time with us throughout the game.  Privileged to stand on the goal line, I took several photos of the coaches and players while they were practicing. To be that close was surreal.

At the end of the first quarter, a man wearing a #80 jersey and jeans walked toward us and smiled at us as he crossed in front of the platform we were sitting on.  I told Tim that he looked like Jerry Rice.  Tim replied, “Mom, that is Jerry Rice.”  I didn’t think it was Jerry, because at the start of the game he was wearing his yellow Hall of Fame jacket.  Jerry continued to walk over to the other side of the field and spoke with some SF Police officers.   A few minutes later, with an officer on each side, he came back in our direction on the warning track behind us.   I grabbed my camera and snapped two pictures of him.  When I pulled my camera away from my face, Jerry gestured to me by raising his hand up, pointing toward me and smiling.  Whether he recognized us from the soccer season of the past or not, it was a magical moment for the two of us.

It was an exciting game – pyrotechnics, an F-16 flyover, a #80 card trick in the stands, thousands of spirited fans, and a half time celebration of Jerry’s achievements with Joe Montana, Steve Young, and other former players alongside him.

The 49ers were competitive against the championship Saints – tying the game 22-22 in the 4^th quarter.  However, the Saints defeated them with a field goal in the last seconds of the game.   Though we were disappointed with the 49er loss, it was one of the best experiences we’ve ever shared as mother and son.  We  were the winners.

Please enjoy some of the game photos below.

Be well.

Evelyn

Tim and Goldrush Cheerleaders

Evelyn & Sourdough Sam

Coach Singletary at 49er Practice

Players pre-game warmup

F-16s fly over Candlestick Park

Drew Brees throwing a pass

Alex Smith throwing a pass

Jerry Rice

Fans card trick to honor Jerry Rice's #80

]]> http://www.visiontoactioncoaching.com/blog/?feed=rss2&p=28 2 http://www.visiontoactioncoaching.com/blog/?p=24 http://www.visiontoactioncoaching.com/blog/?p=24#comments Mon, 13 Sep 2010 02:37:05 +0000 evelyn http://www.visiontoactioncoaching.com/blog/?p=24 Continue reading →]]> Many people today are plodding along on a daily treadmill with a full schedule and aren’t really paying close attention to the quality of their lives.  Parents are so busy, that the only time they can “think” is in the shower or on their way to work.  Meals are often rushed or eaten at fast food restaurants, and children are taken to a variety of after school sports or other activities with little time to complete their homework.  By the time the family arrives home, everyone is so exhausted that there is little conversation to share.   And, the next day the pattern continues.   Forgetting their sense of self, the adults are living unconscious lives and teaching their children to.  Sound familiar?

There is so much in the world to encourage us to live meaningful lives, yet we get stuck in a web of activity that creates adrenaline and becomes addictive. Whether we’re single adults, parents with children, or empty nesters, we always have the ability to make life-giving choices.   What do you really want?   What helps you transcend or get to a place of inspiration?

Since we’re close to the end of the current Major League Baseball season, I’d like to share a story with you of an experience that was truly inspiring for me.

Having listened (I wasn’t always watching) to countless Yankee games at family gatherings when I was a child, I grew up with an appreciation for Yogi, Mickey, Joe DiMaggio, and many other players of this legendary baseball team.

On October 18, 1977, I attended Game Six of the World Series vs. the Dodgers at Yankee Stadium.  I had no idea what an amazing night this would be for baseball or for me.

In the second inning, Reggie Jackson hit a home run into the right field stands.  Any home run causes mass transcendence in Yankee Stadium, but this one was followed by another home run in the fifth inning into the right field stands.   This second homer created absolute delirium in the ballpark, a kind of baseball spirit I had never experienced before.  Then, in the eighth inning, Reggie homered again on the third pitch, a 450-footer into the bleacher seats.  This was his third home run in a single game!  No one had ever achieved this in a World Series – not Ruth, Gehrig, DiMaggio or Mantle.  It was remarkable!

I don’t think that any  fan in the stadium had a voice at the end of this record setting World Series.  The Yankees won the pennant that night, and Reggie was aptly named “Mr. October” honoring him for his incredible performance.

I have attended many baseball games since 1977, and have never experienced anything like this.

Have an inspiration deficit?  Do something you enjoy with the people you love.

Be well.

Evelyn

Elphaba, born with a green face due to her mother’s transgressions, is weighed down by the teasing remarks of her classmates.   Elphie has integrity, but is treated as an outcast and is well on her way to becoming the Wicked Witch of the West.  Unwilling to compromise her values, when tricked by the Wizard, her frustration reaches an emotional peak when she sings Defying Gravity. The citizens of Oz want to “bring her down.”  The lyrics, beautifully written by Stephen Schwartz, express her need to “rise above it all.”

It goes like this…Something has changed within me/Something is not the same/ I’m through with playing by the rules/ Of someone else’s game/ Too late for second guessing/ Too late to go back to sleep/ It’s time to trust my instincts/ Close my eyes and leap.

It’s time to try/ Defying gravity/ I think I’ll try/ Defying gravity/ And you can’t pull me down.  As the song progresses, Elphaba remarkably ascends above the stage taking flight with her broom in hand – a sign to all that no one will ever bring her down!  End of Act I

We are all weighed down from time to time with worries, disappointments, disillusionment, or personal tragedy.  Unfortunately, getting through the tough times isn’t easy.   These life challenges can ultimately make us stronger, however. We need support from family, friends, and other mentors who can assist us to ascend once again.    It is important to find the resources available to help us heal our past hurts, light the fire within, and begin the next Act. It’s up to us to take that leap and Defy Gravity!

Thank you to my family, friends, and mentors for your love, support, and inspiration.  You know who you are!

Be well.

Evelyn